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Like the key to your heart

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Like the key to your heart

She left without a note. It troubled my mind more than it ever did. It sounds cliche to say, that I still smell the scent of jasmine on the linens and the sound of her high heels in the kitchen –much like the last times she swore she had enough. She packed her toothbrush she left in the medicine cabinet to the right of the aspirin. And took her white hairbrush she leaves unreservedly on the nightstand, in which she brushes three times through the tangles in her hair, wraps in a messy bun only to wake in the morning with knots in her hair. She left with her jacket. Her undying obsession with lord and Taylor gets the best of my paycheck. The closet in disarray. Hangers on the floor. Much like my pride. But something is different on this occasion. But I am unable to decipher. I make my way to the foyer. And there goes all hope. Not only did she leave without a note, with her toothbrush and clothes. She left this time without a key….. –she left this time.

Lets turn the page


Build a story with me. Lets reminisce on the past while we escape to the future.

Waist deep in thought


I’ll watch the night turn light blue. But it’s not the same without you, Because it takes two to whisper quietly,
The silence isn’t so bad, Till I look at my hands and feel sad,
‘Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly.

Hang on

Hang on

“Distance, timing, breakdown, fighting
Silence, this train runs off its tracks
Kiss me, try to fix it, could you just try to listen?
Hang up, give up, for the life of us we can’t get back…”

Vague sound of …

Vague sound of rain
pierces through my song again
but I get distracted by the way his toes move when he plays
so I let it burn

I just poured my heart out
there’s bits of it on the floor
And I take what’s left of it and rinse it under cold water
And call him up for more

He grabs my wrists
as my fingers turn into angry fists
and I wisper why can’t you love me, I’ll change for you
I’ll play the part

And I say baby, so I feel stupid to call you, but I’m lonely
And I don’t think you meant it when you said you couldn’t love me
And I thought maybe if I kissed the way you do, you’d feel it too

He said I’m sorry
so sorry
I’m sorry
I am sorry

I am sorry

If you must go, leave with my heart.

The chaotic way that I obnoxiously used to tell you i loved you. your face lit with fear, and that was the moment I knew. That alone simply left me with something to hold on to. But something has changed. I see it all so clearly. I must let you go.

Welcome to the world

In my mind I imagine that the mistakes I made are much bigger than they really are. To me that doesn’t make them any less of an imperfection of mine. I’m really trying to convince myself that I’m not as absolutely terrible as I make believe. The fact that I self sabotage everything makes nothing easier for me. I’m not the nicest person, even though it’s something I’ve heard so very often. But I know one thing for sure is that I’m not selfish. It’s funny that when I decide to finally do something to benefit myself or when I don’t stand down from an argument I’m being self centered. I think it’s actually because you don’t see me do things for myself very often… That it’s surprising. In my mind, the simplicity of it would be that you give me forgiveness because you need it, because I need it, because we need it. But in all the chaos I will be hanging on a limb until I fall. And finally… Welcome to the world of simplicity and the insight to chaos.